I would probably say that the last 2 weeks have been a little harder than normal. I’ve been a bit more stressed at work (nothing like before) but I’ve been proud to say I have managed it and I have got immediate-future plans to control certain situation. It’s something I don’t think I have been able to do before because of either not knowing how, being frightened of the outcome or simply unwilling to take the risk, but f*ck it, what’s the worst that can happen?
Take my money and send me the Doctor Pepper!
I’ve been in charge at work this week as my line manager is away, again, drinking gin somewhere… she sounds like she has an easy life! I’m sure I’ll get a wrap round the knuckles for this! **no, really! she beats me! This is a cry for help!**
Jokes aside, we were expecting a visit from the regional and divisional managers so I made a sincere and conscious effort (more than normal, as you do) prior to their arrival.
Throughout my life, I’ve always been told by a few people, one who happens to look like Patrick Stewart, who I call Dad, that hard work pays off. It’s something you don’t really think about when said but every so often this phrase presents itself to you in life and says “Haha, here’s the hard work paying off, I told you so, never doubt me again!”
We all know that hard work pays off but we never really believe it until it inevitably happens, maybe throw in a little karma for not believing the ones we should.
So, after all the procrastination and contemplating how to word this ‘hard work’, there is nothing really complicated about it!
We worked incredibly hard as a team to get the store ship-shape – The usual of coming to work early to sort paperwork, staying late to clean and really putting in the extra effort – Some might have thought we were expecting ‘Big Lizzie’ the way we were cleaning! *Big Lizzie being the Queen – Sorry for addressing you like a porn star, your majesty.
Slightly more nervous than… well, for once, I’m stuck for what to say *shocker*, but let’s go for slightly more nervous than me receiving a crate of Jack Daniels, the big guns arrived and we completed our shop floor walk and chat about figures etc. I won’t bore you with the details (although guys, if you are reading this, I thoroughly enjoyed your visit!) but it went very well.
A very long story short, as always, it went incredibly well. It wasn’t perfect, but nothing ever is, and I can’t believe I am saying that because I am a perfectionist!
But hey-ho, it genuinely went really well. The praise I got during and after the visit was extremely appreciated. I thrive off this sort of thing and there was a mention of a hefty pay rise, I’m sure, gents…? I’m sure we covered this didn’t we?!
I’ve really got stuck into work more recently – I think the logic behind it lies within fighting the depression. If I keep busy then I won’t have a chance to slip into that awful state again – The same with most things. I concentrate more on work though because naturally it’s a big part of my life – Just like the rest of us – Minus the scum who sit on their ass and sponge off the government – Or shall I say our salaries! – So it’s good to keep busy and have a new challenge and work on a project.
Depression is giving up on life, well, feeling like that or having those feelings inside your head even when you are at your happiest.
It’s like, why would you even think like that? It’s really bizarre – Just like making a trifle which consists of half a roast dinner and the traditional ingredients of cream, lady fingers and custard.
I think it’s fair to say this is the happiest I have ever felt in my life, yet something is counteracting it. I’m working incredibly hard to eradicate it but for some reason she’s not shifting – Just like when you ask a rather large-framed woman to give you her last piece of choccy cake.
You’ve got more chance of her walking up Rodney’s Pillar. In the dark. Backwards. With ankle weights.
Terry Crews fans and ‘EuroTraining’ you better have laughed at that one!
I’ve added these two photos as they are recent ones from my Instagram account. It’s a little if not a lot hypocritical of me because I slated social media in the past for being too ‘common’, but f*ck it, I can do what I want!
Anyway… my point being – I don’t really remember! Ha!
Oh yeah – It was about feeling the best in my life. These photos make me smile because they are from happy points in my life – Somewhere along the line they have made me smile and re-visiting these photos depicting our beautiful sunshine beating down on the wonderful landscapes we reside upon really is something special. Makes me take a deep breath every time I see them and think ‘wow, life has no real worries’. If something happens it happens.
I hate that phrase because it’s stating the obvious but it’s a good one nevertheless.
I seem to have gone mad. If somebody had said 2 months ago that I was going to be fitness mad in 8 weeks time then I would have laughed in their face and sectioned them under the 136 Mental Health Act.
I am not really sure what it is – But something is driving me to complete all this exercise and keep my mind active, it feels so good, I literally feel invincible. I hope this isn’t a massive jinx now!
I think all these things I am doing, which are a little out of the ordinary for me, are brought on by my subconscious. Somewhere in the back of mind the word depression is floating around and my body wants and is trying so hard to eradicate it completely. Whether it will or not, who knows, but it’s certainly a battle I am winning at the moment.
This week of annual leave has been filled with exercise and food. It’s Kirsty’s birthday (anniversary of!) so I’ve been eating some unhealthy food but counteracting it with relentless exercise and keeping as active as possible.
I’ve mentioned this in previous blog posts – But my love of food has somewhat tripled or even quadrupled since I have given up alcohol. It’s not that fact that I am eating more of it but I get so excited when thinking, preparing and more so eating it!
I can definitely feel a change in my body. It’s a little over 9 weeks since I started going back to the gym, again! In the past I have wanted results far too quickly – They have inevitably not happened so I have given up far too easily. This time is different. I’ve been very tenacious with the attendance of how many times a week I visit this holy place. I’ve also attempted to ingrain a religious ‘debt’ in my mind so I won’t forgot to go (conveniently), say that I can’t be arsed or think of a piss-poor excuse as to why I am not going!
I am only cheating myself… blah blah blah… it sounds like a nagging wife/mother/other female family member when I read that back to myself but it couldn’t be nearer to the truth.