Small progress is still progress

Tomorrow will mark the day that I stopped drinking 2 weeks ago. This is part of my 6-month challenge which will aid me if I have an episode of depression again. I’ve said ‘if’ because I am trying to remain as positive as possible!

By achieving something, it will hopefully give me the impression that I have achieved something, big or small, which will eradicate the feeling of hopelessness, worthlessness and self-existence; three very big factors of thinking when an episode hits you.

Since the last post I have had a second session of therapy/counselling/whatever you want to call it. I think the technical term is life cocaching purely because the things in my life are not quite on track at the moment and I need a little help to adjust – Happy to admit it and anyone else reading this should not be ashamed… no one is perfect.

If they are… give them your middle finger! Haha.

I’ve also started taking medication. After weeks of deliberation and taking advice from a few close friends and family, I’ve started on the 20mg Citalopram tablets which have been prescribed to me from my GP.

Just before I go onto talking about them, make sure you see a GP who you like and find one of you can who will connect with you emotionally.

It sounds like a lot to find in a GP but if you can find it then great. The GP I saw at my local surgery seemed to be very distant – I appreciate she probably hasn’t been through depression herself, but just just seemed disinterested.

From the moment I entered the room, it’s almost as if she tried to usher me out as soon as possible with the quickest diagnosis and medication in history! Not very good when you are almost reaching out for help and trying to find a solution to this dark cloud above your head.

The NHS clearly needs to invest in more money into mental health. Given the staggering statistics that in men, between the ages of 20 and 34, people succumb to some sort of mental health illness and take their lives more times than cancer and other illnesses combined will kill them.

I know the World is over-populated but please… let people die from a disease/illness they cannot prevent… don’t let them take their own lives!

Anyway, the Citalopram. There are some side effects; sweating and sleepless nights are the ones I have experienced in 5 days. It may be too soon to experience these, but whether they are psychological or not, I still have them.

Over time, my body will adjust to them and the side-effects will naturally disappear and will become part of ‘normal life’.

From my research, my brain reduces a lower amount of seretonin which is used by th body to determine my ‘mood’. If this mood is lower and I have an episode of depression, it will counter-act it and I won’t be able to manage it properly – Compared to if I had a normal amount of serotonin. The tablets will increase this amount of serotonin and it will help me manage the episodes I may or may not have.

Fingers crossed.

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